Review of 2020

2019 has been my best year yet in terms of writing and this is mostly down to the fact that I made the decision to self-publish. As a writer I have never been interested in writing to market or writing something that will appeal to everyone. What I wanted was to write happy endings for queer, disabled women like me. I love romance and I love romance tropes and my aim is to write all the romance tropes but queer and kinky and without the problematic elements that are present in so many tropes. I feel like self-publishing allows me to write exactly what I want to write without having to worry if agents and publishers will consider it marketable. I’ve always thought that if it’s something I want to write then there will be an audience for it, even if that audience is small. I don’t need to be a bestselling author or win awards, I’m just happy that I’ve been able to find an audience for my books.

Kneel

KNEEL Cover
The first book I published was Kneel: Stories of Lesbian Submission. This is a book of three short stories. Two of them, Mistress and Secretly Submissive, were previously published in Ladylit anthologies, and Desk Job is a new story. All of the stories are F/F D/s erotic romance. Mistress and Desk Job are both told from the perspective of autistic characters and the Domme in Desk Job has arthritis.

I had some really amazing feedback for Kneel and it currently has all five-star ratings on Goodreads. One reviewer, Alice, said “Loved these short stories. They were fun, had great representation (I especially loved the Autistic rep as an Autistic reader), the dynamics were great. Definitely recommend to readers looking for fun kinky short stories.” Another reviewer, Catherine, wrote that my stories are clear and precise, wonderful and original.

You can buy Kneel here

Bound to the Monarchs

Bound to the Monarchs Ebook cover

My second book this year was Bound to the Monarchs, an FFM polyamorous, fantasy romance story set in a world where being queer is the norm and most people mate in threes. This is the first book in my Lencura series, and it focuses on Vitoria, a disabled woman who stumbles onto shifter lands and into the arms of the dominant shifter king and queen.
One reviewer, Catherine, described Bound to the Monarchs as having “everything you could want. Triads, shifters, love and BDSM.” Another reviewer said, “What a wonderful story. It’s so refreshing to read about a disabled heroine have adventures, fall in love and find happiness. The author did a great job of depicting disability honestly. The polym relationship was hot, and the world engaging.”  C.Glen found the story sweet and endearing and author Lila Mina described it as “excellent writing, sensual and emotional with a lovely heroine at the center of a very original world.”
You can buy Bound to the Monarchs here

No Room At The Inn

Desk
My third and final book of the year was No Room At The Inn, a kinky friends to lovers Christmas Romance. It’s the first book in my The Kinky Hotel series. It’s told from the point of a view of an autistic woman who is stranded at the erotic hotel where she works and has to share a room with one of her friends.
One reviewer HC said it was, “a lovely holiday read! I very much enjoyed Emma and Sylvia and very much wanted them to figure things out and be together! The kink is well done and very hot, with excellent D/s dynamics and well done humiliation kink. Consent was very clearly presented throughout. I had the biggest smile at the happily ever after.” Another reviewer said “If you’re looking for a quick sub/dom f/f Christmas novella with a lot of smut this one is for you.”

You can buy No Room At The Inn here

 

A HUGE thank you to everyone who has bought my books, reviewed or rated my books, promoted my books and just generally been supportive. A special thanks to my wonderful critique partners.

I have lots more exciting projects planned for 2020, including the return of the Autistic Book Project, so keep an eye on my blog and twitter and sign up to my newsletter to keep up to date.

I hope you have a very happy new year!

 

No Room At The Inn: Out 18 December 2019

Desk.jpg

As Christmas is my favourite holiday I had to write something to celebrate!

No Room At The Inn is a kinky erotic Christmas romance novella and the first book in my new series, The Hotel. The series is based in an erotic hotel called the Hotel Aletheia. This book takes place the week before Christmas. Emma, an autistic submissive lesbian, and Sylvia, a bisexual domme, are stranded at the hotel and there’s only one room available.

This novella contains very explicit sex scenes between two women.

You can buy it here: https://storyoriginapp.com/universalbooklinks/a807f04a-192e-11ea-96a8-7f7f0f5a687c

Content Warnings (including spoilers):

Continue reading No Room At The Inn: Out 18 December 2019

Bound to the Monarchs Chapter 1

This is the first chapter of my book, Bound to the Monarchs. For content warnings please go here.

Chapter One

The sun was setting over the mountains of Herdoona as Vitoria continued down the Boundary Road. She glanced down at the clock on her dashboard. Two hours until darkness. Two hours to get safely to a sanctuary.

She drummed her fingers against the steering wheel and drew a deep breath. When she got to the refuge perhaps she would be able to breathe a little easier. Perhaps the knot in her chest would ease a little. Perhaps she would stop feeling the inexplicable pull towards Palici, the shifter lands. Perhaps, but she wasn’t confident.

Her journey was taking longer than she’d anticipated. She’d agreed to meet Mira on the last day of the lunar cycle. At the rate she was going, she would be lucky if she made it. Maybe she could send a bird from the next refuge, ask Mira to wait for her. Not for the first time, she wondered if she was making a mistake. Was she really moving to a region that didn’t even have cell phone reception?

Vitoria kept her eyes on the road ahead. The mountains of Herdoona loomed to her left, the forests of Palici beckoned from her right. Ahead was nothing but wide-open road. She hadn’t passed another vehicle for hours. The ones she’d seen earlier in the day had all taken shelter at the last sanctuary. She should’ve stopped with them but she had a deadline to keep to.

She looked down at her navigation system. An hour to the next refuge point. She should make it before the sun set. A chill ran down her arms and she turned the heat up. What if she didn’t make it?

No. She would make it. There were nearly two hours until nightfall and she was only an hour away. She would make it.

She felt a pull on the knot around her heart and forced her eyes to remain on the road. She wouldn’t look towards the forests. Wouldn’t think on why it felt like they were calling her home. Home was in Calibrai. Home was what she’d left behind. Home was where she was going to.

Sorcery was supposed to come from Herdoona, so why did she feel the pull from the shifter lands?

Lights flickered up ahead and she glanced back down at the navigation system. There shouldn’t be anything there. No street lights. No buildings. Nothing.

Bang!          

She instinctively raised her hands to her ears. Brighter light flared and her heart jumped into her mouth.

Marauders. It had to be marauders. They would see her pointed ears and know she was a Solviso and that would be it. She pulled her hair out of its ponytail and smoothed it over her ears. Throwing her hands back onto the steering wheel, she hunched over and gripped it for dear life, slowing her van, but not stopping.

No one stopped on the Boundary Road. Not this close to darkness.

What should she do?

Red, orange, and yellow lights danced in her path like a joyous monster. A fire.

She couldn’t continue ahead.

Knowing only that she had to avoid marauders at all costs, Vitoria turned her van to the right and put her foot on the accelerator. She drove over the verge and into the overgrown grass, towards the forest. She glanced into her mirror. Nothing behind her. The marauders probably didn’t even know she was there. The van bounced as she bounded over bumps, her teeth banging like castanets. The boxy vehicle wasn’t made to drive off road. She pulled out onto a wide dirt path and drove into the forest. She felt a jolt to her chest and her breath caught. She gasped in air and the feeling receded, the knot around her heart disappeared, and it felt like a cocoon had formed where the knot had been. She looked down at her navigation system. She was on the Free Land, two miles from the border of Palici.

She turned off her engine, unbuckled her seatbelt and checked the locks. Her hands trembled and she inhaled deeply. Safe for now. The automatic dome light clicked off and she reached over to the glove compartment and pulled out her torch. Dim light spilled from it. She should get some sleep, get on the move when the sun rose.

Another check of the door locks and she could settle in. Climbing out of the only seat in the van, Vitoria stooped over to avoid hitting her head on the ceiling. The wan light from her torch illuminated the little home she had made for herself in the back. A large mattress filled most of the space, blankets and clothing piled on top of it. Three battered cardboard boxes sat at the foot of her bed. One box for clothes, another for food, a third for all the sentimental crap that she couldn’t force herself to part with. She picked up the bag by her chair and slung it over her shoulder. Bottles, some empty, some full of water, littered the floor, and she kicked them out of the way as she made her way to the bed. She kicked off her shoes and lowered herself onto the soft pallet.

If she had made it to the refuge she would have spent some time reading, but the light from her torch was dim and she had to save the power. She reached into the bag. Her gun was still there, loaded and ready. So close to the border of Palici, home to the Demalyn, the shifter designation, and it was all she had to defend herself. And her walking stick, if it came to it. She hoped it wouldn’t. Last time she’d had to use her walking stick as a weapon she’d damaged it and she didn’t have the money to replace this one.

She put her bag next to the bed and clicked off the torch, resting it next to her head. In the morning, she would make her way back to the Boundary Road. The Demalyn would never know she’d been there.

 

*

 

Vitoria surfaced into a dream. It had to be a dream, because she’d never been inside a room so lavish. The ceiling soared, the painting of the goddess Lencura was barely visible from the ground, and she only recognised her from the distinctive red and gold robes she wore. People sat in groups of three, all wearing gold sarongs, chests bare. She followed their gazes to the front of the room. The golden thrones atop their dais looked like something from a fairy tale. Two people sat there, a King and a Queen, she assumed.

As she regarded them, Vitoria’s heart sped up and her skin flushed.

They were magnificent.

The King’s long black hair fell in a braid down his back, his skin was tanned from the sun, and his dark brown eyes surveyed the room. The Queen’s auburn hair fell in soft waves over her bare, sun-bronzed breasts, her green eyes defiant and fixed on a man with tawny brown skin and grey hair, who was standing at a podium.

“The war is over,” the man was saying.

“We are quite aware of that, Prime Minister,” the Queen’s words were clipped. “Having fought in the war ourselves.”

“The council thinks,” the Prime Minister continued. “That it is time you found your third mate. We mate in threes because that is how the goddess intended it, and she intended it this way so we would have the necessary balance in our relationships and in our rule. As the ruling monarchs-”

“Your concerns are noted,” the King interrupted. “My mate and I will retire for the night and we shall return to this after dawn.”

“What is there to return to?” The Prime Minister asked. “You must find your mate. Surely you mean to use traditional methods? What is there to discuss?”

“We will return to this after dawn,” the Queen said firmly.

She rose gracefully and her mate followed suit. The King took the Queen’s hand in his and she entwined their fingers together. The King glanced towards the Queen. She held her head high as they left the room, her gaze fixed ahead. She looked cold, composed, in control.

Vitoria walked behind them, invisible through the silent room. They ascended a grand staircase and walked through one of the many doors that lined the corridor. The King locked the door behind them and Vitoria glanced around the room. It was a large bedroom with a four-poster bed in the middle. Imagine sleeping on that. It was probably soft and warm and nothing like the mattress she was used to sleeping on.

She turned back to the monarchs. The King pulled the Queen into his arms, she wound hers around his waist and pressed her face against his chest.

“Don’t cry, my love,” the King said. He stroked a hand down her bare back.

“Perhaps we should have remained soldiers.” The Queen’s voice shook.

“Perhaps, but no one refuses the honour of becoming monarchs.”

“They shouldn’t have chosen us, they should have chosen someone who was properly mated.”

“They weren’t all properly mated before they became monarchs.”

The Queen looked up at the King and Vitoria could see tear tracks on her cheeks. “They were all properly mated before they reached thirty solar cycles. Every single one of them. And I am to be thirty-three at the end of this solar cycle, and you shortly after.”

The King placed a kiss on the Queen’s shoulder. “We’ve been good monarchs. We brought peace to our lands and prosperity to our people,” he said.

“Good monarchs, save for our lack of a third mate. We have failed, Antonio. Failed our people. Failed our mate who is out there somewhere alone, without our protection.”

“The other monarchs didn’t come to power in the middle of a war, Matilda. If we had time to travel, as they had, perhaps we would be mated.”

Matilda shook her head. “The goddess is supposed to bring our mate to us. Perhaps they are right, perhaps we are not blessed by the goddess or fit to be monarchs.”

“They didn’t say that.”

“They implied it.”

“We brought peace to our lands. We have rebuilt cities and towns. Our people have food. They are safe and happy, and if that is not a blessing…”

He stopped talking abruptly and raised a hand to his chest. Matilda pulled away from him and placed her hand over her own heart.

“I’ve only felt this once before,” he said. “The day I knew you were my mate.”

“Our mate,” Matilda said. “We must go to her.”

 

*

 

Dim dawn light filtered into the van, waking Vitoria from a dream. Her mind was groggy as she pulled the duvet up over her eyes and for a few blissful moments enjoyed the comfort of her bed. The remnants of the dream lingered, leaving a warmth that spread from the cocoon around her heart and permeated her entire body. She wanted to stay exactly where she was. If she moved she might lose that feeling. When she moved it would be back to the real world. She tugged at a thread of memory, but the more she tried to remember her dream, the further away it seemed.

The dream was gone. She was back in her van, sleeping on an old mattress, wishing for a real home where she could lock the door and know that no one would be able to get in. Somewhere where she had neighbours, where she knew her surroundings. She would have that. When she reached Malita, she would have a home and neighbours, and everything that she’d had before her father had passed over. She ignored the voice that told her that her neighbours would be Dengara, that they might not accept a Solviso, and that her surroundings would be dark for half of each solar cycle. It was still better than living in a tiny van with nothing but her gun for protection.

She sat up and turned onto her knees. She gently placed one foot flat and tried to put her weight onto it. When she was confident that she could do so without injuring herself or falling, she stood up. She glanced around the room, looking for her stick. She needed to remember to bring it to bed with her. Just because her joints were fine the night before, didn’t mean they would be when she woke. She picked up her bag and hobbled over to the stick.

She slid out of the van, squinting her eyes to protect them from the bright morning sun. She winced slightly as all her weight was placed on her bad ankle. Not that the good one was much better. She stayed close to the vehicle while she relieved herself. It wouldn’t do to wander out in the woods. Who knew what she would find there?

She climbed back up and into the seat and strapped herself in. The morning meal could wait until she was back on the road. She had to make up for the lost time. Whatever had been on the Boundary Road the night before seemed like less of a threat than the feeling that had taken root inside her. The feeling that told her that she had to go further into the forest and onto the Demalyn lands.

She was a rationalist. She followed logic and science, and although the Demalyn were known as a fair and just designation, she would be a trespasser on their land.

She turned the key. The engine made a noise and then nothing happened. She tried again. Nothing.

“Shit!” she shouted as she banged her hand against the wheel. “Not now.”

There was nowhere to go for help. It was too far to walk to the next refuge and even if it had been closer, it wasn’t safe to walk along the Boundary Road. She climbed back out, ignoring the pain that was spreading from her right ankle all the way up her leg. She pulled up the hood and looked inside. What the hell was she going to do? She didn’t even know what she was looking at.

She turned around, glancing about as though someone would magically appear to help her, but there was no one there. Which was a good thing. Who knew what they would do to her if there had been someone there? She climbed up into the driver’s seat and tried again. Nothing.

She turned on her navigation system and zoomed out, looking to see if there was anything nearby. There was a settlement, by the size of it a large town or a city, through the forest nearby. She would have to cross over into Palici, the region belonging to the shapeshifting Demalyn, and walk through the trees. And when she got there? Maybe they would help her. Maybe. Her instinct, if that was what the overwhelming urge to venture into Demalyn territory was, told her to go with that plan. That they would help her.

She grabbed her bag, locked up her van, and began to walk through the forest towards Palici.

 

*

 

A couple of miles into the forest, Vitoria’s right ankle ached, both hips throbbed, and her hand had stiffened around the walking stick. As much as she hurt now, she knew that she would be in agony in the morning. She had to keep going. If she stopped, she might never start again.

The forest was dense. Some light filtered through the canopy of leaves, enough to see by, enough that she couldn’t justify using the limited power of her torch. She would need it when night fell. Though they were in the hottest part of the solar cycle, it was cool in the forest and a breeze brushed over her bare arms. She wished that she’d grabbed a shawl from her van, but she hadn’t imagined that it would be cold further into the forest. She looked down at the navigation system. She was on track to get to the city, but there was no way that she would make it by dark, not at the rate she was going. What if she had to sleep in the forest?

Fear burned inside her. What was out there in the forest? She’d read a lot about the world outside of Calibrai and if she remembered rightly, the wild animals of Palici posed no danger to people. She still didn’t want to spend a night in a cold, dark forest. She had some food and water in her bag, along with her gun and a little money, but nothing that would keep her warm.

Something howled behind her. She couldn’t tell how far away it was and she turned to see if it was close. Nothing there. She picked up her pace, adrenaline overwhelming the pain in her body. She stumbled, twisted her left ankle – her good one – and fell. Pain shot up her right leg and she whimpered. A growl came from her left and she turned her head.

Amber eyes stared out from the darkness, another pair of green eyes appearing next to it. No. It wasn’t darkness. That was their fur. She placed her walking stick against the ground and tried to pull herself up. Her legs gave way immediately. Low growls and hisses echoed around her. She tried to drag herself away. There was no way she could out-crawl them. Even if she could stand, even if she wasn’t injured, she couldn’t outrun the Demalyn. No Solviso, even the non-disabled ones, could. She looked ahead and more Demalyn appeared. Big cats, dogs, bears.

She was surrounded.

 

Available now on Amazon.

Bound to the Monarchs Available for Pre-Order

3D 1Blurb

Millennia ago, the people of Lencura were split into designations dependent on their abilities. Vitoria is a solviso. Others consider them the weakest of the designations but Vitoria knows she’s stronger than people think. Sure, she can’t fly, shift, or conjure magic but her blood has healing properties that the other designations covet and she knows she can use that to her advantage. She’s aware of the dangers that lurk outside of her region and that the other designations would do just about anything to possess her blood but when her father’s death leaves her homeless she’s willing to take the risk for the chance of a better life.

When Vitoria encounters marauders on her way to start a new life in the northern region of Malita, she’s forced to take a detour. Her van breaks down on the border of the shifter lands and she follows her instinct, venturing into the forbidden shifter territory. Better to take her chances with shifters than marauders. Vitoria is placed under the protection of Queen Mathilda and her mate, King Antonio. Mathilda and Antonio’s dominance awakens a passion in Vitoria that she never knew she possessed and she wonders if she might be the third mate they’ve been looking for.

When a dignitary from a neighbouring monarchdom kidnaps Vitoria and offers her anything she could ever want in return for her blood, she realises the only thing she wants is to be Mathilda and Antonio’s. Her monarchs will do anything to get her back but Vitoria isn’t sure what they really want: her or her blood.

Pre-Order Links

Amazon UK

Amazon US

Amazon Australia 

Amazon Canada 

Amazon will pay me a small fee for any books ordered through these links at no extra cost to you.

CONTENT WARNINGS (includes spoilers)

Continue reading Bound to the Monarchs Available for Pre-Order

Executive Dysfunction and Expenses

If you knew me through work you would never guess that the organised, focused social worker who can remember details about every child she has ever worked with and keep on top of even the most complex of cases struggles with executive dysfunction. Unless that is, you are my manager who is always chasing my out of date expenses or the woman from finance who is always emailing me about missing expense receipts.

The truth is, that while I do not struggle with social work or most aspects of my writing career, I do struggle with everything else. My expenses are always out of date. I have yet to take a gas metre reading on a property that I moved into eight months ago. I forget to buy essentials and often forget to eat. I have over 100 messages waiting to be read on my phone (don’t mention the emails) and I keep forgetting to book a dentist appointment for a filling that was recommended almost two years ago.

One of the things that frustrates me is that if I could afford certain things, my executive dysfunction would be less of a problem but executive dysfunction is expensive so I can’t afford the things that would help. Despite having a job that should provide me with a comfortable income I am always broke. Of course, it doesn’t help that being physically disabled is also expensive.

Some examples of expenses that arise from my disabilities:

-Lunch. I often buy things to make a packed lunch but forget to take it with me and then I have to spend a ridiculous amount of money on sandwiches.

-Taxis for when it’s just too painful to walk.

-Essentials bought at higher cost because I forgot to buy them in advance and have to pay extra to buy them at expensive corner shops.

-Pre-prepared food. My condition fluctuates so if I had better executive functioning I would be able to pre-prepare my own food for when I can’t chop or peel. Instead I have to buy pre-chopped or peeled food.

I am determined that this year is going to be better. I bought a book to do my budgeting (nothing motivates me like nice stationary and lists) and I am going to try to save money so that I can buy things that would help me and hire people to support me. I might also get around to the benefits application that I’ve been meaning to do forever.

I’ve started off quite well. My food budget for the month is £100 for a big shop (cupboard food, frozen food etc and pain killers) and then £15 per week for fresh food. I was recently told that I need to lower my cholesterol so I really need to prioritise eating fresh fruits and vegetables and foods that are known to help with cholesterol (yes, I am a millennial who is prioritising avocado in my budget). I split this between two shops. Ocado offered £20 off if I spent £80 and Tesco had a good offer on for quorn products so I spent £60 at Ocado and £40 at Tesco (if it’s under £40 you have to pay an extra charge). I didn’t meal plan so I may end up eating strange combinations of food by the end of the month!

Perhaps the only good money saving thing about executive dysfunction is that I often forget to do the food shopping and then forget to stop at the corner shop and end up eating every single thing in my flat before I remember to go shopping so food rarely wastes.

Four days into the new year… I hope I can keep this up!